If you’re looking for something to impress, satiate and stimulate, here’s some menu ideas if you’re on cooking duty this Valentine’s eve.
We’ve designed a menu easy to digest (no awkward moments), laced with aphrodisiacs, included some food eaten with hands and focused on sexy textures (silken panna cotta, pink fleshy ocean trout) food that reference nudity, and token phallic nibbles.
There’s even vegetarian and vegan options to impress those of you who’ve managed to pick up your yoga teacher.
Because every romantic meal needs something phallic.
It’s pink and fleshy, and tastes good.
A creamy, rosy and delicate number.
Don’t pussy foot around with dainty food if you want to get to known someone better. Tuck into a big bowl of these babies with your hands. It’s messy, spicy, requires slurping and all feels a bit primal.
Surf & turf, reef & beef – there’s a lot of meat & seafood combinations that make my skin crawl but this combination of beef and oysters is a match made in heaven. The subtle sweet salty flavour of the oyster mayonnaise is a welcome balance to the robust flavour punch of the rare beef. Aphrodisiac
Gnudi means ‘nude’ in Italian, referring to these as ‘nude’ ravioli, as they are have a pasta-less outer.
Bring out the blowtorch. You can both have a go. There’s flame, excitement, adrenaline will be high. Then you get to eat creamy creme brûlée that you have both made, cracking the and spooning up with silky, rich and caramelly cream.
Exotic sounding and tasting, with the additional benefit of nutmeg’s aphrodisiac qualities.
This dessert tastes like the countryside, and the countryside is wholesome sexy.